The stranger from the different land

It was the feeling, uncertainty, keeping her on her toes. She missed it but she was scared of it. As every time in her life she meets someone. But this time was different. Her heart started beating faster just of the thought of him. Her mind was playing the games that he is the one, he is perfect, even she barely knew him. Something about him. His smile. His eyes. His body and soul.

She never checked her phone so many times during the day, during work, even its not allowed. She just had this urge to see if he texted. Finally. Which also made her feel pathetic checking her phone so much as a teenage girl with a crush.

She liked to remember those moments they were together, even there wasn´t many of those moments. From the moment she saw him in the other end of the room in the club, she thought he is the most beautiful man she ever saw. Even he was dressed with simple t-shirt and jeans, there was something about him, about his face which caught her attention. She was shy, as always, she doesn´t even go out that much. She didn´t even knew how to start a conversation, and she couldn´t, she was scared and shaking as a leaf on the tree. And she was cursing herself for being this shy. She tried to hang around him, just see him. She couldn´t stop looking. This caught his attention. He came close to her and asked her to dance, she said yes. She couldn´t believe that this beautiful mans hand are around her. And their story began.

They have met few times, and every time seemed amazing. Maybe it was in her mind, but seeing him even for couple hours was making her happy. She felt butterflies again, it was a good feeling. Laying next to him and looking into his dark eyes and seeing beauty was the highlight of her week. She felt so lucky. She didn´t feel beautiful enough to have him. That made her feel insecure, but secretly proud of herself to have him by her side. Even she didn´t really have him. There was no labels, no complications.

She knew from beginning that he won´t stay in the country for long, since he will go back home. That didn´t stop her. Those happy moment together was something she could cherish. And he already invited her to visit, so there was some little hope left. And she kept on it.

Every time they been together, part of him was open book, part was a secret. She tried to peal the leafs of him to see whats more inside, but that was hard. Sometimes she got nervous and said the wrong thing. Every time if it took him more then couple minutes to answer she felt like she did something wrong. And she tried so hard not to mess it up.

The moment came when he had to leave, for a while or for forever, who really knew. Even she barely knew him, she wanted to run after him for sense of love and adventure. Even it was already weird between them, he stopped talking with her, and his last conversation towards her was quite rude. She thought she did something wrong, even she didn´t. He tried to push her away with nasty words which was not called for. Couple days went by and they didn´t talk, but she knew this was the day he is leaving and she wanted at least to wish him a good flight. She was shocked then she was that he blocked her. She was in tears.

It made her to rethink everything. What did she do? Be honest and herself? Stand up to him when he was making fun of her? Her little heart that moment got broken. Maybe everything he ever said was a lie? Maybe he never left? Maybe he used her and lied to her? Why he said he does´t want to leave anymore after he met her?  She wanted the answers but same time she was not ready for the truth. A women somewhere gets hurt every minute by someone. When you don´t make the right choices, sometimes you need to suffer consequences.  It happened to her again. She kept replaying those beautiful moments in her head for a while until she was able to put them in a box and close it. She now just felt stupid for falling so fast, superficially, and not looking and all red flags which were waiving in front of her eyes.

He was a very beautiful rare bird, the one which caught her eyes and made her heart to shake from joy and fear of loosing this feeling. But he was a bird and he needed to fly away. Such birds should be just looked at from a far not brought into your life. She understood that now. It took a minute, but she was fine.